90 Hilarious Pick Up Lines That Actually Get a Laugh

How to use a funny pick up line (without being that person)

Delivery matters more than the line itself. Keep these rules in mind:

• Lean into the cheese. Say it with a grin, as if you know exactly how ridiculous it is. Confidence plus self-awareness is charming.
• Read the room. A noisy bar, a friend's party and a dating app all call for different energy. If someone looks busy or uninterested, let it go.
• Have a follow-up ready. The line is only the opener. Follow it with a real question, like "Okay, that was terrible. What are you drinking?"
• Keep it respectful. Skip lines about bodies or anything that could make someone uncomfortable. Funny beats edgy.
• Accept a no gracefully. A smile and "Fair enough, have a good night" leaves everyone feeling good.

Food puns that are a little too cheesy

1. Are you a croissant? Because I'm feeling flaky about everyone else tonight.
2. If you were a vegetable, you'd be a cute-cumber.
3. Are you a pizza? Because I'd never let you go to waste.
4. I must be a snowflake, because I've fallen for you. Also, I'm melting. Is it hot in here?
5. You must be a banana, because I find you a-peeling.
6. Are you made of avocado? Because you're the guac to my chips.
7. Are we at the bakery? Because I'm loafing this conversation.
8. You're like a cup of coffee: I can't think straight until I've had a word with you.
9. Are you a donut? Because I'd glaze into your eyes all day.
10. Lettuce get together sometime.
11. I'm not a baker, but I'd love to make a date with you. Get it? Date? Like the fruit?
12. Are you a taco? Because I'd hold you carefully so nothing falls apart.
13. If you were a fruit, you'd be a fine-apple.
14. Do you like raisins? How about a date?
15. Are you a smoothie? Because you just blended right into my thoughts.
16. You're the sprinkles on my otherwise very plain cupcake of a day.

Nerdy and science lines

1. Are you made of copper and tellurium? Because you're Cu-Te.
2. Are you a 90-degree angle? Because you look just right.
3. I must be a magnet, because I'm totally attracted to you, and also I mess up everyone's credit cards.
4. If you were a triangle, you'd be acute one.
5. Do you have 11 protons? Because you're sodium fine.
6. Are you a black hole? Because time seems to stop when I'm near you.
7. You must be the square root of negative one, because you can't be real.
8. I'd tell you a chemistry joke, but I'm afraid I wouldn't get a reaction.
9. Are you Wi-Fi? Because I'm feeling a strong connection.
10. You must be a software update, because I didn't expect you, but now I can't ignore you.
11. Are you a keyboard? Because you're exactly my type.
12. If you were a browser tab, I'd never close you.
13. Are you a library book? Because I'm checking you out, and I promise to return you on time.
14. You must be a carbon sample, because I want to date you.
15. My love for you is like pi: irrational and never-ending.
16. Are you a high score? Because I've been trying to beat my nerves just to say hi.

Self-aware lines that admit they're terrible

1. I had a really smooth pick up line ready, but you're so cute I forgot it. So, hi.
2. On a scale of one to ten, how bad is this pick up line going to be?
3. I'm not good at pick up lines, so here's a real question: what's the best thing that happened to you today?
4. I was going to use a cheesy line, but I'm lactose intolerant.
5. My friends bet me I couldn't start a conversation with the most interesting person here. Want to help me win twenty bucks?
6. I'm writing a book on terrible pick up lines. Can I test one on you?
7. Rate this pick up line out of ten. Be gentle, I'm sensitive.
8. I don't have a line. I just wanted to say you have a great laugh.
9. Is your name Google? Because you have everything I've been searching for. Sorry, I know, that one's ancient.
10. I'd use a line on you, but I suspect you've heard them all, so let's skip to the part where we're friends.
11. This is me, being brave. Please clap.
12. Hi. I practiced this in the mirror and it went much better there.
13. I'm terrible at flirting. Can you give me some pointers? You can start by telling me your name.
14. I was told to come over here and say something charming. Unfortunately, they didn't tell me what.

Animal and nature puns

1. Are you a beaver? Because dam.
2. If you were a penguin, I'd waddle across the ice for you.
3. Are you an owl? Because I'm owl yours if you want.
4. You otter know how cute you are.
5. I think you're un-bee-lievable.
6. Do you like whales? Because I whale always love you.
7. You're the cat's pajamas, and I'm just the dog trying to get your attention.
8. Are you a parking ticket? Because you've got "fine" written all over you.
9. Are you a garden? Because I'd love to dig deeper into this conversation.
10. You must be a sunflower, because you just turned toward me and lit up the room.
11. I'm a little bit shellfish, because I want you all to myself.
12. If you were a fish, you'd be a catch.
13. Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again with a puppy?
14. You must be a dolphin, because you're making my heart flip.

Classic groaners with a twist

1. Are you a magician? Because whenever I look at you, everyone else disappears. Even the bartender. I'm getting thirsty.
2. Did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Asking because I'm a nurse and that's a serious fall.
3. Do you have a map? I keep getting lost in your eyes, and also, I genuinely don't know where the restroom is.
4. Are you a campfire? Because you're hot and I want s'more.
5. If you were words on a page, you'd be fine print. Because I'd read every detail.
6. Is your dad a boxer? Because you're a knockout.
7. Are you a time traveler? Because I see you in my future.
8. Do you have a Band-Aid? I scraped my knee falling for you.
9. Are you a loan? Because you've got my interest.
10. Is it hot in here, or is it just you? No, seriously, is the AC broken?
11. Are you a bank? Because I'd like to make a deposit of compliments.
12. If beauty were time, you'd be eternity. And I'd still be late.
13. Are you a parking spot? Because I've been circling all night looking for someone like you.
14. Are you French? Because Eiffel for you.

Lines made for texting and dating apps

1. Quick question: pineapple on pizza, yes or no? This decides everything.
2. Your profile says you love hiking. I love sitting at the top of hills after someone else drove me there. We'd balance each other out.
3. Do you have a name, or can I call you mine? Okay, too fast. What's your name?
4. I swiped right, so legally we have to share our favorite snacks now.
5. I'm not saying you're the best match I've had, but my phone just did a little happy dance.
6. If you were a playlist, you'd be all bangers, no skips.
7. Two truths and a lie, go. I'll guess.
8. Are you an emoji? Because you just made me smile.
9. I'm not a photographer, but I can picture us getting tacos.
10. Your dog is very cute. You're also fine, I guess. Kidding. Mostly.
11. I was going to wait three days to message you, but I'm terrible at waiting.
12. Are you autocorrect? Because you keep changing my mind about this app.
13. Let's skip the small talk: what's your most controversial food opinion?
14. On a scale of one to America, how free are you this weekend?
15. You seem like trouble. The fun kind, right?
16. Is your name Wi-Fi? Because I'm searching for a connection and you're showing full bars.

Knowing when to drop the act

Funny lines open doors, but real conversation keeps them open. Once you've gotten a laugh, shift into something genuine: ask about their day, comment on something you have in common, or share a story of your own. If you want more ideas for that next step, see our guides on how to start a conversation with a girl and how to keep a conversation going.

Looking for a different flavor? Browse clever pick up lines, cheesy pickup lines for him or dumb pick up lines that are so bad they're good, or explore the full pickup lines collection.